Don’t Keep Dumping Stuff on the Strong Friend

Everybody has good days and bad days.

Some people focus a lot on their bad days, amplify them and stretch them on and on. There are others who have their moments and manage them without sounding an alarm.

The latter is the ‘strong’ friend. We all have one or more or we are that friend.

The strong friend goes through the roadblocks of life, faces them and manages to keep an even keel, even in life’s greatest storms. This friend feels, manages these feelings and gets through them often without saying anything. This often means that those around him or her get the impression that this friend’s life is perfect.

As we all know, no one has a perfect life. Some people complain about every obstacle, while others focus inward and keep pushing as they go over these again and again.

It is easy to keep dumping stuff on the friend who is handling his or her baggage and not shouting about it to the world. Personalities differ. This does not mean he or she should always be bombarded with every crisis from others. People often forget to ask that friend, “How are you?” The perception over time is that he or she is always fine.

No one is always fine. Some talk about their problems over and over again and others work their way through them silently.

Hence, if you have a strong friend who you never think has a problem, stop and think again. Ask how he or she is doing from time to time and really listen.

It’s nice to bear each other’s burdens; let’s be conscientious.


  1. Oh yes… you have articulated my thoughts perfectly. There are days I want to shout this truth from some random rooftop… when things get a bit much and some folks seem to think I exist only to attend to their agenda… not even a sincere “How are you?” as a preface.


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