Category Archives: Reflection

The Grass isn't Greener, Everywhere has its Quirks

How many of us choose to focus on an opportunity that seems oh so attractive, so that it clouds our view of the good things we have going right where we are now.

The grass isn’t always greener on the other side though. This cliche is sometimes true.

When we focus on something negative for too long, it could just be one negative thing, it grows and grows and causes a whole world of discontentment. It can be quite overwhelming to the point where we run off to supposed greener pastures and then discover that we left something good.

Spend some time reflecting and noting the positives against the negatives of a situation before making a decision to change path. This is applicable to a whole range of situations. It should also not be done hastily or when we are feeling low.

I am learning that everywhere has its quirks and sometimes it is worth pushing through some stormy seasons. I am learning to persevere and enjoy the positives as I learn, work on myself and grow amidst the negatives. A permanent decision ought not to be taken to address a temporary situation. Everything in life will not be fine all the time. Trials and struggles really do make us strong if we look at them as learning opportunities.

Now, if we are in a situation, whatever it is and know it is toxic and ruining our minds, then it’s good to walk away. Nothing is worth us compromising our mental health. This is far from simple but the effort to do so is worth it.

I have been blessed to be able to walk away from a toxic work environment before. I remember feeling uneasy about it even though it was the right thing to do. I am happy I took the plunge at the time and it was well worth it. I was able to do this with some confidence because I had saved up some money, to allow me to take what I thought, was a job with a lower salary. In time even that was sorted.

Moving from one job to another, for example, includes dedicated research and networking in some cases. It is always good to keep an eye on what is going on in different sectors of interest and also polishing our CVs from time to time. It’s nice to be content in a job but it is also good to be aware of what is happening in the industry. This means than, we can more accurately weigh an opportunity, to see if it is greener than where we are at. Regardless of this, it is good to remember everywhere has its quirks. When the novelty wears off there will always be something that may cause us some discomfort. I think its best to learn from this, grow and keep going. It often happens that not focusing on this lessens its impact. Choose to focus on the positives and remind yourself of them often.

The grass is sometimes greener indeed but how devastating is it when we jump without proper preparation. We may find that the new grass is filled with even more weeds than where we ran from. Everywhere has it quirks, expect these and resolve to be content despite them but know when to move on to other opportunities.

Flowers from Kirstenbosch Gardens, Cape Town

This is a beautiful place with exquisite flora and fauna. As we close this decade, I pray and hope that we all will have many days filled with beauty like these flowers.

This is a lovely place to enjoy a day in Cape Town. There is something about being in nature and seeing all the sea of kaleidoscopic hues going on and on because the garden is so vast and huge. Wear comfy shoes to walk and take it all in. It is one of the stops on the City Sightseeing Tour bus, so hop off and explore.

Life, like these picturesque flowers is delicate and fade away so fast. I always try to remember this and it is something I am reflecting on as I anticipate a new year. I am grateful for a good 2019, for family, friends, good health and financial freedom among other things.

What makes your life beautiful? Continue to nurture and water those things.

How do you make the lives of others beautiful? Be intentional about this.

Let’s remember to stop and smell the proverbial roses, count our blessings and be thankful for all we have. Also, let us remember to share with those who are in need.

Balance this because, of course ‘we can’t pour from an empty cup.’

Enjoy the beauty in the simple things and wonderful people around.

Life, is indeed what we make of it. Focus on being proactive and not reactive.

Try to expect any and everything in life, good and bad.

Even with its ups and downs, we can enjoy life and find beauty in many simple things around us. I am always in awe of the beautiful colours in nature, they often lift my mood.

This garden is one that reminded me of the beauty of nature and when I think back on it I feel a sense of peace.

How are you Working on yourself to be your Best you?

Working on yourself to be your best you doesn’t only pertain to academic pursuits. It is wonderful to get different certifications and equip oneself for different opportunities. Here I am talking about focusing on the intangibles that pay you an a deeper level.

Do you love yourself? Do you also like yourself? Being the best you requires that you answer to these questions in the affirmative. If this isn’t the case then you should do the work needed to get to the place where you state an emphatic “yes!” to these questions.

So, you are in love with who you are and you like yourself, lovely. I do too, as we all should.

Do you like how you communicate with others? Do you walk away from an encounter feeling frustrated that you couldn’t get your point across? Do you know how sometimes, it is only after having a conversation that you know what you should have said? Listen to really hear what is being said, do not rush to answer, give yourself a few seconds to frame your thoughts and deliver them appropriately. With practice this becomes easier to do. It is quite a task to control our emotions especially in heated moments. Explaining yourself clearly in different settings is something worth mastering.

Do you find it hard to say no to others? If you do, take some time to assess who you find it particularly hard to say no to. Be honest with yourself and try to get to the bottom of why this is the case. Often this stems from a fear of disappointing someone who you think will form a negative impression of you. The people in our lives who care for us will understand when we tell them no sometimes. If you only say yes to someone every time because you feel pressured, that is something you need to work on. Every time you say yes to doing something in your free time, you may be saying no to yourself. Therefore, the things you say yes to should interest you.

I know exercising and being active is of vital importance for me to be my best self. Since, I enjoy being a couch potato after being on my feet most of the day, I walk the 1.3km to and from the train station everyday instead of taking the bus. I also take the stairs in the station and forego the escalator. Every little bit helps. In the same way, I try not to eat too much crap and eat light in the evenings. Fruits, veggies, nuts, beans and water are staples. Chicken makes a cameo appearance once in a while and fish has its time to shine. I really like grilled salmon. My body feels good fuelled by these things. When I cheat and eat some other stuff my body sure protests.

Are you an empathetic person? Do you try to help others as needed? I know we can’t help everyone. It is easy for some people to give others money to help them but not their time. Everybody is busy in this fast paced world. Being your best you may mean giving more of your time to others. Meet friends and talk without distractions. Set aside 30 mins to call up someone, schedule it if needed. In certain places where people have all their material needs met, the gift of someone’s time can be precious.

How are you working on yourself to be your best you? No one is perfect. Each day is an opportunity to improve in some way. Something as simple as deciding to change your outlook on some things in your life is a step closer to being your best you

We are all works in progress and by being intentional we can become who we want to be day by day.

What do you Need to Stop Procrastinating about ?

Procrastination is really the thief of time as the adage goes. I mean there are so many sayings cautioning us not to procrastinate but alas we do it. What are you procrastinating about? Why do you procrastinate and what do you need to stop procrastinating about?

All of this is easier said than done. However, the first step begins with honestly facing up to what makes you procrastinate about that one thing? You know that thing that you want to do but leave it hanging…

Are you afraid of failing? Remember failure is a part of the process to learning and growing.

Are you afraid of being vulnerable. Pray about it and try to step out in faith.

Is it that you don’t have the finances necessary to bring this thing to life? How about sharing the idea with someone who may be able to help by investing in your dream?

Write the book, or finish it in my case.

Research, plan, save and go after the new job/career etc.

Do some free online courses to learn about how to run and manage a business if it’s your calling. Platforms like Coursera and Future Learn, offer loads of courses from different universities around the world for free in some cases. Spend some time investing in your dream in this way and less time on social media.

Sometimes you have to do some things without knowing how it will all end. This is faith at work. I remember a few years ago I was just not liking the atmosphere of one place where I was working. I took to applying for different jobs. interestingly, the job that on the surface seemed to pay the least worked out to be the best with a good salary. I am happy I took the leap. I caution you to save and have a buffer while enjoying life, to enable you to do something like this.

Some people want to travel but put that off usually because of money. This is valid. However, you can have a ten year plan where you save as little as $20 – 30 USD a month for a dream trip. Do the math. The trick is to think about how much a trip like that would cost in that period of time and start saving for it now. Have a separate account and let it mount up. Even if it takes more than ten years, your reward will be the dream trip.

You may be at the stage where your first step to stop procrastinating is to write down your ideas, goals, dreams etc. Put it somewhere so you can see it often and remember it. You will be more likely to do something about it. Also, don’t be shy to ask for help. Speak to people who can help and know that yes, someone may not be open to helping but keep knocking on doors.

Keep pushing and going after what you want. Life is best lived as an active participant in your own life. No one else can do your life like you can. Fix your eyes on your path and don’t be distracted by what others are doing. What’s yours is yours and vice versa. Rejoice with others and don’t cultivate envy… nurture positive thoughts especially when things seem to be falling apart. Again, this isn’t easy but it’s worth it in the long run.